“[I’m glad he didn’t come home to visits us tonight or ever again. I feel less stressed and more relaxed. All he does is lay on the sofa and plays on his Facebook. If he is a concerned son, he would get up and find out what help we needed around the house. He doesn’t tell us his sentiments or if he has “hurt feelings”.]” Mutha said.
I’ll take the fall on this one. I was being intentionally nasty to him/hiss twit wifey/his in-laws. Because I already “foresaw” many inauspicious events.
The strange part is how they take to heart certain of my personal wishes, which I have NOT forgotten and of which I will personally ABSORB back my karmic debt proper. I did tell them to “make their own rules”. I see this “experiment” worked out unfavorably. Oh, well.
Here is a lost: not holding his birthday at his house because he is so damn old, not calling my elderly parents but contacting me first, bringing their own food if their eating requirements are different, not spending/wasting their hard-earned money on us old timers whose appetites/sense of smell is waning, etc.
He has deliberately prevented us from telling her the bitter truth. He had been dishonest with her by manipulating our wishes to his favor. He failed to address vital issues with her.
He disowned his Filipino heritage, disrespected his OLD family/their wishes, and ignored other signs/symptoms from other “friends”.
He married into a very traditional Chinese family, who were refugees from Vietnam. They immigrated to Indonesian and then America.
Most people who have between through these series of trauma are, well, disturbed. The deaths of the father and brother further troubled the already disturbed family.
Now because of their tradition, they have to act “crazy” to ward off “evil spirits”/”bad luck”. And guess who gets their cooties of mistreatment? My family and me!
I didn’t know this until the pieces if the puzzles fell into place earlier this year! We eventually learned that they only are concerned among themselves and totally ignore the “in-laws”. This is done out of respect.
Mutha also admitted and after hearing her son mumble his breath that it’s better NOT to see/visit each other too frequently. This includes friends, too. ALL welcomes will be eventually tiresome.
Further, the boy is still living in constant denial that we’re open-minded enough to tolerate their cultural differences. He allows them to mistreat my family. It’s NOT okay with us.
He fails to “level” with his well-trained/Westernized Filipino family. Kim’s Vietnamese parents are pissed-off at the Chinese in-laws, too. So, we’re NOT the only ones who noticed the mismatches in marriages.
Anyway, I like the Chinese tradition of “returning monetary gifts”. I felt hurt and shocked at this rude expression of respect. But I tried to rationalize the symbolic gesture. My nagging/old thoughts finally realized the meaning behind this ancient tradition.
This is one area that Hawaiians, Samoans, Islanders, and pals must learn. By NOT returning these “gifts” or “loans”, they seek only their deaths. That will answer your questions why y’all are CURSED!
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