So, I’m supposed to be beautiful, according to his co-worker by the name of ‘Jerk Turdannatto’. Yesterday, he has verbally communicated to me this data at work and loudly enough for the nearby co-workers to hear (and perhaps) giggle about his admission.
But if that were so true, why don’t I feel like I’m beautiful? I told him that if I were indeed this beautiful I should have been married by now with lots of kids, money and a nice house with a white picket fence somewhere. At least, I should have all these guys knocking down my door, calling me on the phone, emailing or chatting.
I hate chatting after being traumatized. Recently, I’ve learned a hard lesson that these guys are out to harm me. Some really seem to love me although we have not met in person. So I’ll have to actually talk to real people instead of hiding behind the computer.
Thanks to a nice co-worker, I’ve received another dose of reality. His advice is for me to get out and do things and stop kidding myself about negativity. I am slow to understand what this concept of ‘fun’ is all about and go beyond the confines of being comfortable in the home of my parents.
I suppose the only outlet for my frustration and for not having a ‘real’ life outside home is through this blogging. And my fellow warriors have been and are reading these blogs because this account was specifically set up back in February 2006 for a forum.
I assume that the only possibility for this mysterious ‘J@ck B!ll*’ of Florida to find this account of mine is through that particular forum. I did read about an article about an ‘opus dei,’ told a fellow warrior chatter about an Italiano named ‘J@ck B!ll*’ of Florida and then surprise! his Yahoo! ID/account of ‘b*ss@ss!n‘ was created to scare me.
But who’s fault is it for not being happy- being inside or outside the box, at home or on vacation, on the computer or out on a real date? I know I am beautiful on the outside but on the inside I don’t feel the need to prove that I am.
I could go back to the successful ways of meeting people (or cute guys) by wearing pretty dresses and high heels (!) and dying my hair lighter. This could be possible if I could have the chance to spend the tons of my hard-earned money that seem to not have yet been re-paid.
My story is long and diverse about some very intellectual people, who ‘found’ me via a chatter from six (6) years ago. His face is not the most handsome but he is a good person. I have no regrets for not knowing how to avoid con-artists or scammers or would-be admirers except my putting on weight from sitting down all day.
P.S. Please forgive my English, if I do not make myself clear enough.
P.S.S. There are lots more wispy cloud activities today, along with those trail clouds being spewed by those planes. I took more pictures of these nice clouds, which seem longer than yesterday’s rounder version. And there was one large one with rainbow colors inside around lunchtime today.
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Wednesday August 23, 2006 – 04:19pm (PDT) Edit | Delete | Permanent Link | 0 Comments
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