http://www.plinky.com/prompts/1394/answers/new
Dearly beloved and chumps,
We are gathered here tonight to remember our fallen sister, Miss Evil Kitty. Long has she lived to witness and testify of the goodness and beauty in all that is natural and loving among the gardens of daffodils and green meadows, only to be shot down by ungrateful and undeserving fools who took away her happiness and joy as a house cat and champion mouser.
Amidst the chaos and destruction of her reality, the removal of relationships she once held so close and dear to her heart, so does she leaves us with one thing to remember: What have you done for each other? Have you shared your leftover nom-noms with other homeless cats and pals? How have you to atone for your sins of taking more for yourself and not leaving a tidbit or morsel of offerings and toys to appease her caterwauls, too?
Blessed are they who have come to know how she and many others have done beyond her share of tithing to morons – purring, meowing, and scratching your faces as reminders of your mortality. Blessed are they who have silenced the Truth of her cattidue from catnip high to urine-like fire. Yes, fire once burned in her heart, a passionate one full of life and living.
Let us not remember her empty shell, a meat sake that once house her eternal Soul and core personality to scare away Death with a hiss or two. Let us instead be mindful of our thoughts in prayerful remembrance and how Miss Evil Kitty has watched our every moves silently in the night. During the day, let us rejoice that she is in a better place among her own kinds in spirit.
Let us pray: Oh Evil Kitty, why doth thou test us so? We meant you no harm! Really, we just didn’t know that you were just a cat passing by and not an intruder from the other side of the fence. Those damn neighbors really rode on our nerves but we got along just fine when you were around. Now that you have gone, we will miss you. May you find peace always. Amen.
(Gosh! This has got to be an awful time for the owners!)
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