To the Boss:
I really hate going to church because of my belief system! In the first place, I’m NOT a “people-person”, too. I could barely stand being next to anyone, let alone your Mom. But because of these two unimpressive old farts, I’m obliged to attend mass until I’m good and dead! God must hate me!
At 1005 AM, your Mom sent a text to me about inviting the three of us to a party next Saturday evening. I can’t go alone to represent my family because I don’t drive well in the dark. My eyesight has been terrible lately – lots of glare through my eyeglasses and the car’s windshield.
At 1514 PM, your Mom sent a text to me about wearing the robe and inquiring about the “line up” of music. I skipped tonight’s choir because we already attended the eight o’clock mass this morning and the twosome did NOT want me to join for whatever reason! Plus, I felt that she could have asked you instead of using me.
At 2223 PM, your Mom sent a text to me about seeing me this Sunday mass. I really wanted to disappear altogether. I’m NOT going to show up Saturday evening because we will attend the eight o’clock mass tomorrow morning to complete the Benediction, in which the Adoration is 24-hours in the Chapel.
Just so you know, I noticed the loudest member of that group and his wife, heck, most of YOUR relatives have been “ignoring” me. I would turn around to “peace with the fuckers” and there would be no direct eye contact. Y’all are so fucking weird. I’m sick of your kinds. Count me out, dammit!
Huh,
Flynn…
P.S. Assholes…
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