My paternal relatives are a bunch of weaklings! I swear!
Auntie Malnorm: Her hands are so big! She came and didn’t greet the people there and plopped over next to and old lady, our granny, who made faces of twists and turns when Maw called to Paw in his full Filipino name and rather loudly.
Uncle Gigalo: Paw asked him why he was coughing so much. But as typical of the paternal relatives, he wouldn’t speak a word about his moderate emphysema! These people hide the truth, their weakness and continue to show their strength during their dying days. Fakers.
Cousin Shill: I remember her crying over the phone to Joseph, the stalker later on after the break-up or the mouse as per her Maw, because he was shorter than her. She complained about not being able to breath after ingesting medicine to control her acne. I drove her to Kaiser in Hayward, CA in my new car long ago. She stopped crying when I sped up to get her into the emergency room. Fakers.
Uncle Henpeck: He was a no show because his wife, Babel, who worked at the nursing home, had a fight with the Bitter one. He was supposed to have been TOO SICK to show his pock-marked face. Fakers.
Auntie Malouse: She had chest pains two Fridays ago and went to the emergency room. For all we know, there was nothing friggin’ wrong with her except that she didn’t take one of thirteen or more pills. She hugged Paw for a long time during old granny’s birthday party and then me for a few moments longer. I don’t feel sorry for her. I noticed her very TIRED-looking, husband James was cleaning up, tying the plastic bags of garbage for throwing away. Fakers.
Uncle Dead: He claims to have lumbar problems. Maw has scoliosis and osteoporosis. I have a double herniated disk. I remember how he wouldn’t help clean up after the party of old granny three or more years ago. f I were CA state, I would strip him of his disability. Fakers.
Auntie Maldeath: She is still loud but appears to need guidance (from the likes of moi, who can be loud, too. Brouhaha!). She mentioned her strength and how she overcame the death of son, Kev, and the death of her father, my lolo, whom I believe couldn’t reconcile with the daughter for going off and getting pregnant with Kev out of wedlock. She used her ugly black forest cake, which I half-drop when her pissed off husband, Orge, handed it to me rather roughly, over our Goldilocks, mocha-flavored cake with flowers. Fakers.
Uncle Smack: His family came late and left within five minutes because Uncle Gigalo wanted us to visit the Bitter one. He wore the usual casual clothes of jeans, rubber shoes and tight double-knitted shirt. I pointed out that similarity in clothing to the Twit’s husband, the boy.
Everyone else related to my paternal side are strangers.
Summary of nutters: The point is there are psychos who make themselves sick and expect sympathy for being helpless. They won’t get pity from me except an internal laughter of – good for you, losers – my bad!