There was very little to do at work on Thursday. After all these years, I managed to get my two fifteen minutes break by snoozing at my desk. This sleepiness occurred around 15:00PM to about 16:00PM. I would hear the amplified sounds of co-workers nearby my cubicle due to my sensitized state. I knew then I would fall into deep sleep but had to stifle that feeling to appear busy at work.
My travel back home was especially scary because I felt woozy and almost passed out during gridlock. I was stuck on an incline, which is a bridge over Interstate 880. The cars were not moving. And the dizzying effects of gasping for air made me roll down both my windows with the strong cool breeze blowing inside the car and turn on the air conditioner with the air blowing directly on my face for the much needed air.
Both dose of extra air did not help me feel like my having shortness of breath. Recently, I’ve been feeling pain in my jaws, neck, and between my shoulder blades too. The head and ear pressure has been ongoing for over a year. I’ve been irritable and snappy lately, too. I had to schedule a doctor’s appointment for that annual physical check up to make sure my system is running normally.
The evening wore on and I couldn’t stay in front of my home computer. I actually went downstairs and stayed the whole evening to hear Maw tell her stories of pain and suffering and how she overcame obstacles that allowed her to realize how futile her concerns are for other people other than herself. She went on to blame Paw for his lack of emotional support with compassion and understanding for others than himself and for his high defensiveness to protect his decision making abilities.
After removing ourselves from the master bedroom where the original rant occurred, we found our way to the family room. Here, she treated her asthma with the machine. We also had a late snack of poos-puus (a Filipino porridge dish of sweet rice and venison) and watched the late night show to end the night of long talks.
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